I no longer cared what anyone thought.
I no longer felt judged by my peers.
When my husband travels for work my feeling of safety promptly packs its bags and goes right along with him. Nighttime thrusts me into the wanting arms of despair where I find myself acutely aware of my alone-ness and in complete fear of the darkness.
Did you know that the amount of time that passes from the moment the bottom of the sun kisses the horizon until the top of the sun bids its daytime farewell is less than 5 short minutes?
It is in that time that I am awakened to the opportunities for elusively lurking evil, lingering and waiting in the hidden corners made available by the moon-lit night.
I shrink in the darkness.
When the kids are tucked away in their beds, the TV is off and the lights are out I cannot keep from foreboding what trouble may lie ahead in the coming hours of the night.
The quiet of my room is faithfully interrupted by distant, yet eerily close sounds from unknown origins. As my eyes adjust from pitch black to subtle shades of grays I cannot avoid the mysterious movement of shadows dancing randomly, yet methodically against the crevices of my bedroom windows and walls.
My heart pounds loudly and painfully at my chest as if to escape me in an effort to avoid the on-coming thoughts of the source behind the dancing shadows.
I expect evil in the darkness.
My mind enters the threshold of dark spiritual and worldly possibilities and it sometimes stays there a bit too long.
However, the Holy Spirit, even more faithful than the rising and setting sun, ushers my mind into a super-natural light, fueled by truth that comforts my shaken soul. It sweetly plays the song of Psalm 23:4 on my heart…
“Yes, though I walk through the [deep, sunless] valley of the shadow of death, I will fear or dread no evil, for You are with me; Your rod [to protect] and Your staff [to guide], they comfort me.”
I find Him in the darkness.
Conviction overtakes me as I recall the demon-possessed boy’s father in Mark 9. I am like that father, in my fear asking Jesus to have mercy on me and to help me if He can.
He questions me in this desperate moment… “if I can?” He reminds me… “Anything is possible for him who believes!” And I cry out just like that father… again and again… “I do believe, help me overcome my unbelief!”
Though dark valleys do call, at night or by passing trial,
I sense your protection, your comfort and your presence with me all the while.
Satan’s fortune is that my distress would deplete and devour me, But my anguish elicits Your being and evil claims no victory.
I trust you my Father, I beg you… increase my faith,
I do believe, you know my heart, cure me, no… save me from my unbelief!
I’m sharing a poem with you today for Word Filled Wednesday. It’s called “My Name is Pride,” by Beth Moore. It has a bit of a bite to it, but I love it because it knocks the pride right out of me…
We absolutely love it!
They do a fabulous job of bringing the books to life; we are so engaged by the actors and the imagery that they portray in our minds that we can hardly wait to get back in the car again to pick up where we left off. I did not read the stories as a kid, so listening to the audio dramas for the first time with my children is quite thrilling.
And, of course when Aslan comes back to life and conquers the White Witch I can’t help but dwell on the resurrection of Jesus and our hope for His return one day. These were all wonderful opportunities for me to pause the audio and delve deeper with my children into those Spiritual truths giving them a clearer understanding of who we are and the magnitude of what Jesus did for us.
Thoughtful Thursday: Do we have more than we need?
~Walk in his ways, and
~Keep his commandments.
This Valentine’s Day, let’s remember our first love.
~don’t forget the desert times;
~remember what it was like the day you accepted Christ.
~ remorse for back-turning;
~ sorrow for sin.
~confess your sins;
~realize He doesn’t exist for us, We exist for Him.
~ God uses the longings of our hearts to bring us into a deeper relationship with Him;
~ We begin doing things out of love for Him.
~ return to your first love; the One who first loved you;
~ make sure our light (lampstand) still burns for the glory of God.
~the Bible is a book about God;
~get to know Him.
Your earthly Valentine may bring you candy, but your divine Valentine, the Lord Your God, provides you with something even sweeter, His Holy Word.
How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth! Psalm 119:103
Happy Valentines Day Sweet Sisters!